Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Blog Challenge Day 9: Future

So, I am impressing myself with my commitment to keeping up this blog challenge.

Anyway, I think this is a little redundant to the "Where I'd Like to be in Ten Years" topic but since I can't come up with something more creative, I'll just go with this one but focus on the longer, longer term.

One of my favorite songs is Alan Jackson's "Remember When." Actually I'm pretty sure it is my favorite. I always think of this song when I think of how I'd like my future to look. Starting in the far future and moving backwards, I hope and pray that Jared and I get to see each other turn gray, retire, and enjoy a whole new season of life that is hopefully full of grandchildren and adventures. I'm hoping I can shed my practical, homebody mantle and enjoy some traveling with my husband. I hope we have made wise choices that afford us the opportunity to enjoy our older years without too many financial worries.

I often pray for my children's future spouses. I like to imagine what they are doing and how they are being shaped and molded to become what I hope is the perfect complement to my kids. To that end, I hope my children find someone to love and share life with. Marriage, for me, has been one of the hardest but most rewarding experiences. I simply can't imagine doing this alone. I know this may sound far-reaching and silly at this point in Charlie's life but every time we've been told of this health challenge or that and more recently, that Charlie's feeding tube is probably a permanent fixture in his life, I worry that it will be stumbling block in his dating life. I know...he's not even two and I have more complicated and pressing matters to worry about but...I'm being honest when I say this has crossed my mind more than once.

I have a wonderful relationship with my parents and my siblings (and in-laws as well!). I hope I can cultivate the same love for family in my children and teach them to rely on each other. I hope I have a deep and meaningful friendship with my kids as they become adults.

I secretly hope I have a "second career"--maybe as a nurse? I love what I do but I also can see myself being fulfilled in a different line of work.

I hope we have a house that people love to come to...that are lives are rich with family and friends and an open door. I really love Portland, more than I expected to, and so I do see us here for the long term but I hope we find that perfect neighborhood. I grew up in a little town that was completely walkable...it was safe, I walked to school, everyone knew each other (that's a little bit of an exaggeration but not much) and it had such personality and charm (and apparently, the second best beach in the country). I really hope we can find a town with a similar feel. Oh--and I would LOVE to have a vacation home, ideally on a lake or at the coast.

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Blog Challenge Day 8: Satisified

So, today's topic is a time when you were most satisfied with your life. This is difficult and has required a lot of thought. It's not that I live being dissatisfied exactly but I do struggle with contentment. I am frequently worrying about or anxious about something or I am thinking about what's next to come. I am especially guilty of this when it comes to my children. I have this very acute awareness that my fertile years are fleeting and I just don't feel done. I don't even particularly want another baby right now but I also can't let go of the idea that I am not ready to be done having them either. But, I digress. Satisfaction is the word of the day.

I think the time I felt the most satisfied overall in life was shortly after we brought Jack home from the hospital. I felt so complete and not just in motherhood but in my marriage. I loved having this person between me and Jared who we created, who we were wholly responsible for. My best memories are of the nights when he was an infant. I did not breastfeed but I did pump. I, as a meticulous, perfectionist, worrying Virgo (ha ha), did not want to leave my milk supply to chance so I woke up every three hours and pumped while Jared bottle fed Jack. We got into the habit of DVR'ing mindless sitcoms and Food Network shows such as Unwrapped. We also ate copious amounts of Uncrustables during this time, which may have contributed to my inability to lose the baby weight (ahem). Anyway, those 30 minute interludes are some of my sweetest memories...we were fumbling new parents, in awe over our little baby and, while fraught with all the worries and anxieties that come with new parenthood, in those midnight moments it was just me, Jared and Jack.

Monday, July 25, 2011

Blog Challenge Day 7: Astrological Sign



Disclaimer: I think astrological signs are fun but pretty much nonsense.

My birthday is September 1 and I am Virgo. Based on the following description, I think it describes me pretty well, actually.

Traditional Virgo Traits:

--Modest and shy (I am modest, I am not shy)
--Meticulous and reliable (I think this is accurate)
--Intelligent and analytical (yes, at least to the analytical part!)
--Fussy and a worrier (YES)
--Overcritical and harsh (hate to admit it but yes)
--Perfectionist and conservative (yes and yes)

Sunday, July 24, 2011

Blog Challenge Day 6: 30 Interesting Facts

Okay, I'm not sure these are interesting or not but here goes...

1. I am one of 5 children. I love coming from a big family.
2. As much as I love coming from a big family, I don't think I want more than 3 kids.
3. I am a birthing-class drop out. Made it through 1/2 of the first class and decided I would learn what I needed when I was in the situation.
4. I have a terrible sense of direction and get lost frequently. I've even gotten lost in a parking lot once.
5. I have a varsity letter in football from high school.
6. I am not athletic at all and particularly hate running.
7. I used to love in-line skating and still kind of wish I had a pair (is inline skating super dorky now???).
8. I primarily work out of my house. I love this arrangement.
9. I am terrified of birds. Especially the thought of them getting into the house and flapping around.
10. Poor table manners are a major pet peeve of mine.
11. I have a terrible habit of mispronouncing words.
12. I have a septate uterus. It has caused me all kinds of grief.
13. I love food and wish I had an easier time dieting.
14. I love newborns but I actually do not love the newborn phase of parenting.
15. In general, I love being pregnant and, after both kids were born, mourned the end of my pregnancies.
16. I always knew I wanted to be a wife and mother. There was never any question about that and I am so grateful that I was afforded the opportunity to do both. I try not to take it for granted.
17. I am very good at multi-tasking but I am learning that I struggle being "present" when there is so much technology to occupy me. I am working on that.
18. Sewing is a new-found hobby and I really love it.
19. I struggle with loving being a working mommy but also wishing I was able to be a SAHM. I wish there was a better balance. I am regretful I don't get to do all of the playgroups, etc.
20. I am not a morning person AT ALL.
21. I have no sense of style whatsoever. Last year, my older sister had to intervene and force me to buy some more stylish t-shirts. It's that bad, friends.
22. I hate doing hair and makeup but I feel so much better when I take the time to do it.
23. I can't wear white to save my life. Within an hour, I have usually spilled something on myself.
24. I am very much a girly-girl. I still love my American Girl dolls.
25. I am highly opinionated and have learned to not be quite so loudmouthed over the years.
26. I am blind without glasses and my eyes won't tolerate contacts anymore.
27. Since having kids, I have struggled with a somewhat paralyzing fear of heights.
28. I have a secret desire to live in Nashville one day.
29. I feel like I would have liked being a nurse and would consider it as a second career later in my life.
30. I didn't love my wedding dress.

Blog Challenge Day 5: Suicide

The challenge for today is to write about a time when you thought of ending your own life. This one is relatively easy--I haven't and can't honestly conceive of feeling that empty and desperate. I am a pretty anxious person...I am frequently anxious about all kinds of things happening/going wrong and have lots of irrational fears (of heights, of birds...). Probably why risk management is a good career for me. In order to stimie these anxieties, I often play "worst case scenario" in my head. I do this about losing jobs, not being able to pay our mortgage, etc., etc. And so, it confounds me that you hear frequently on the news of people not only committing suicide but also taking their loved ones with them as a result of this economy. I'm not passing judgment...just saying that basically, as long as Jared, me and kids were together...well, I feel like we would figure it out.

Friday, July 22, 2011

Blog Challenge Day 4: Views on Religion

I have to be honest, this one isn't making me jump up and down. Mostly because I have strong beliefs on the subject but I also don't like to engage in debate on this topic either. Or marginalize anyone or make anyone feel bad. Can you see the CATHOLIC guilt creeping in? But, in the interest of this challenge, I will post my beliefs.

I am a proud Catholic and Christian. I love the Church, I love everything it represents in my life and the Church has been a source of comfort and stability to me during so many times in my life. I love Jesus and I am humbled and awed by the sacrifice He made for this world.

I hope that I am an example of faith for my children and through my example, they come to know Jesus, as well. But, I want it to be a choice they make for themselves.

Thursday, July 21, 2011

Blog Challenge Day #3: Views on Drugs and Alcohol

Drugs and alcohol...this one is pretty easy for me.

Drugs: Totally 100% against them. In all forms. I'm against the legalization of marijuana and every other drug. It terrifies me to think of losing my children to the grip of drug addictions. I don't have much more to say on the topic.

Alcohol: In moderation. I do enjoy a glass of wine here and there but I generally keep it to the weekends (harder to do when I am at my parents house and being served wine I generally wouldn't purchase for myself). Since having kids, I just haven't had the tolerance for it like I did before. By that I mean, I am nagged by the idea of even one drink impairing my ability to respond as quickly as I might need to in an emergency with my kids. I'm also completely terrified about drunk driving/drunk drivers. I do think alcohol is a slippery, slippery slope for some. That's scary.

Blog Challenge Day 2: Where I'd Like to be in Ten Years

Wow--in ten years I will have a 13 year old and 11 year old! That is hard to imagine!

Career
: I am currently a working mommy right now for a lot of reasons (personal satisfaction, finances, wonderful childcare) but one major reason is that I've always felt like I wanted to pay my dues now so I could hopefully pull back when my kids were hitting the middle school years. So, I really hope in 10 years that we are financially in a place where I can afford to work more part time (and by that I mean I want to be able to be home after school and, most ideally, at least a good chunk of the summer). I think the middle school years are so important and so formative and a time when children can really easily slip away from their parents...so I want to make sure I am wholly present for them during that time.

Family: I would really love if our family had grown by one and that we would have three kids. I'm not sure if this is in our future but there is a stubborn little voice in my head on this topic. We'll see...

There are some parts of ten years away that I feel like I can easily imagine but some parts that I can't...and one of those is with the kids. I have a hard time imagining what/where Charlie will be in ten years health-wise. I never knew anyone who couldn't eat or who had a feeding tube when I was growing up so I have a really hard time imagining Charlie as an adolescent still battling these problems and toting around his little backpack. The writing on the wall says that's exactly where we will be...but I can't imagine what it will look like. My greatest hope for him is that he is able to find his identity in all of this and that his medical conditions don't define him socially. I have the same worries for Jack but on a lesser scale.

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

30 Day Blog Challenge--Your Current Relationship

Alright! I am starting the challenge today!

My current relationship is...married to my husband of 4 years, Jared. We met while working for the same company. We actually met at a technology conference we were both attending. Afterwards, Jared would make random stops at my cubicle. :-) I had a terrible commute to work and someone mentioned he lived in the same general vicinity and knew a better route to work that avoided much of the traffic. I asked him for directions, he suggested we carpool and thus started our friendship. We carpooled together for about 3 months, where we were madly flirting with each other. Finally, we both brought different dates to the company Christmas party but wound up attending an after-party together. We've been together ever since. Jared is the love of my life and I knew very quickly that he was the ONE. We have been through a whole lot in our four short years of marriage...a premature birth and prolonged hospital stay, three job changes on Jared's part, another baby, too many surgeries and medical procedures to count, two major moves (one out of state, one in state but different city)...we've had our ups and downs and it hasn't always been easy but Jared is the only person I would want by my side.

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Commenting Challenge and 30-Day Challenge

Alright, so we are two days into my 30-day challenge and I'm failing miserably. In my defense, I have been occupied with visiting sister and nieces, allergies, a quick surgical procedure for Charlie, the Fourth of July, and an upcoming 2 day trip to Wisconsin and then week long visit from sister-in-law and four nieces/nephews. And, throw a few days of work into that equation and I haven't had much time to breathe, let alone write. However, I do love the Blog Comment Challenge that Jenna from Jenna's Journey is hosting, so I am joining in and will resume (start) my 30-day Blog Challenge on the 18th.

We had a wonderful Fourth of July weekend chock-full of the sounds of cousins laughing, running, and playing; new and old friends and family mingling, and feeling the SUN for the first time in months. Oregon summers sure are glorious, when it finally makes its appearance.

I am off to bed as I have a 7:30 am flight to catch tomorrow morning. If you're new here, "we" are Kate (me), husband Jared and our two little boys, Jack and Charlie. More about our story here.

Sunday, July 3, 2011

30 Day Blog Challenge

Taking a cue from Monica at The Writer Chic, I am going to attempt a 30-day blog challenge, both in an effort to be more consistent with blogging and see if it is something I can actually stick with. Given my sporadic history...well, we will see. I think it will be a fun way to memorialize what my thoughts were on some topics at this point in my life.

I have a really busy week ahead so I am going to do my best to start on July 5th and go from there.

Here is the list of topics, which I reserve the right to change. :-)