Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Christmas 2011

This was definitely the most fun Christmas we've had since becoming parents. This was the first year Jack and Charlie (but Jack especially) really understood and appreciated Christmas. Some highlights from this season:

We kicked off the season on the Sunday after Thanksgiving with a visit to the Festival of Lights at The Grotto , these beautiful gardens that they decorate in lights to tell the story of Christmas, complete with a spectacular nativity scene. Both kids really loved it and we learned here that Jack really adores carolers.

We decided to do one Christmasy activity a week this year. After the Grotto, we also visited Zoo Lights (more carolers!), a Christmas light festival at a raceway (a drive through thing), we did one evening of Christmas shopping at the mall, the Polar Express (more on that below), and a repeat visit to the Grotto.

We took a trip on the Polar Express this year. We have never successfully gotten Jack to sit on Santa's lap without a lot of fuss and crying. Well, the Polar Express was the perfect antidote to that. It was an old-fashioned passenger train, they served hot chocolate and, upon arrival at the North Pole, Santa boarded the train. He then sat with each family for a visit. It was a very personal, non-threatening atmosphere. Both Jack and Charlie sat on his lap. Jack asked for a train, a boat, and skis. Silly boy. I don't know where he gets this stuff!

Christmas music stole the show this year. We put on carols in the car every time we went anywhere. Jack and Charlie both have their favorite songs, which they would ask for at various times. Jingle Bells, Away in a Manger ("Jesus Born" as my boys call it), We Wish You a Merry Christmas, Deck the Halls, and Oh Christmas Tree top the list of favorites. I wish I could seal Charlie's little voice singing "Jingle Bells, jingle bells, hey!" in my head forever. When we visited the nativity scene at the Grotto, Jack approached it singing "Away in a Manger." I'm glad they both seem to understand what the meaning of the season is (Charlie regularly yells out "Jesus Birthday!").

When we got married, Jared and I invested in a Lionel electric train with plans to buy a new car or part to the train each year. We got the Polar Express version. Our goal was that by the time our children are grown, we will be able to give them the start to their own Christmas trains. We definitely reaped the benefits of this investment this year. The kids were captivated by the train. Jack became a very adept "conductor" and can operate the train quite well. It is a special thing and reminds me of my grandfather.

Buddy the Elf was a fun addition to this year. The kids had a lot of fun finding him every morning. On Christmas Eve, he wrapped up his stay with us by making snow angels in sugar. Then, that night, Jack gave him a hug and a kiss and tucked him under the tree so Santa could take him back to the North Pole.

When my parents came to visit, my mother made Christmas cookies. The boys had such fun decorating them with her.


Having my parents and aunt visit for Christmas was so special. I think this may have been the first year in many, many years that my family did not congregate at my parents' house (we've missed a few Christmases down there living 1,000 miles away but everyone else is usually there). With all of us flung far and wide now, we got the benefit of having them visit here. We had a wonderful visit.

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Tube Feeds Tricks, Tips and Techniques

When we first got a g-tube, I scoured the internet for tube feeding resources. After 1.5 years of tube feeding and surviving granulation tissue, infections, feeding the bed, making countless bags of formula, and other tube-feeding mishaps, I feel like something of an expert in this field (except blenderized diets--this is a tube feeding area I know next to nothing about). I thought, for the benefit of other Googlers out there, I would publish some of the things we have found to work.

Caveat: every tube feeding family does it a little different and has different circumstances. My son is on continuous feeds, which is more the exception than the norm. So, some of these things won't make sense for bolus feeding.

**Calmoseptine Ointment: available over the counter in pharmacies (but usually kept behind the counter), Calmoseptine has been the most effective preventive solution to granulation tissue. We put a thick layer on the stoma and then cover it with gauze or button buddies (see below).
**Dressings: Some people don't use dressing for their stomas. Our boys have too much discharge and we find they stay healthier when we keep them covered. We use a combination of split gauze (aka IV sponges) and Button Buddies or a derivative thereof. There are lots of tube feeding mamas who make little g-tube pads to be used in place of gauze. They can be washed and re-used and are often made in cute patterns. Search Etsy as there are many different options.
**Extension Tubing: This is the tubing that attaches to the button (g-tube) and then is further attached to the feeding bag. What kind you can use depends in part on what kind of g-tube you have. We have always had MIC-Key or MIC-Key equivalent g-tube buttons (AMT Mini One). I prefer the AMT Mini-One MIC-Key Compatible extension tubing versus the actual MIC-Key brand tubing. It has a wider diameter, is more flexible and holds the "christmas tree" tip of the feeding bag in place more securely. We use two kinds: the right-angle single port (purple tip) tubes and the y-port (it has a med port for administering meds) right-angle (clear tips) tubes. In all, I prefer using the single port because my son had a habit of opening the med port on the y-port tubes and then getting yucky formula on everything. However, the single port was a challenge to administer medications through. We recently found that using Luer-Lok syringes makes it easy to administer meds through the single port. The Luer-Lok syringe tip fits perfectly and securely into the extension tubing.
**Syringes: see my discussion of Luer-Lok syringes above. We generally order 10 ml syringes but you can get any size as long as they are Luer-Lok. Additionally, we always have 60 ml bolus syringes we use for venting (only necessary if your child has a Nissen Fundoplication) and water flushes.
**G-Tubes: As I mentioned, we use MIC-Key or MIC-Key equivalent g-tubes. I actually prefer AMT Mini-One g-tubes.
**Pumps: We have only ever used the Zevex Enteralite Infinity Pump. I love this pump. We have used the Kangaroo pump in the hospital and it is much heavier and bulkier. I had a small child who started using the pump at 7 mos old. He learned to sit up, crawl and walk wearing his pump. Because it hasn't impacted his mobility, I am a big fan of the Zevex. We would not have had such success with his mobility if he had used the Kangaroo.
**Backpacks: until recently, we used the Zevex Super Mini backpack for our son to carry his pump in. It is very small and makes it easy to carry, even as a baby, but it does have a bit of a tendency to "turtle" him, which can make him less stable when walking. We recently started using backpacks from Feeding Essentials, which we really like. The Feeding Essentials backpack is slimmer (slightly longer) and much lower profile. It also has a better front strap that we have determined reduces chafing on his neck from the straps. Loading the Feeding Essentials is a bit of a pain but way easier on him to carry.
**Formula Pitcher: I am all about efficiency. For this reason, I make my bags once a day and mix all of the day's formula at once. I use the Dr. Brown's formula pitcher. This is a great pitcher as it has an emulsifying mixer attachment for thoroughly combining formula and has exact measurements on the pitcher in both mls and ounces. This is critical when you have a child who is on a very controlled diet and you are counting every ounce they get. I make my bags in the evening. I take what is left of the bag he was feeding from throughout the day (kept cool with freezer packs in the backpack) and add the amount of formula I need for his overnight feed. I then take the remaining formula I have mixed and make a bag for the next day. I refrigerate that bag and then, in the morning, I just load his backpack up. It saves a lot of time.
**Bella Bands: My son goes to preschool/daycare. They were slightly concerned about other kids pulling on any excess tubing that may be visible between his clothes and the backpack. We solved this problem by buying a Bella Band (available at Target and online--it is a pregnancy band) in size XS. We then just put the Band completely over his clothes and backpack. This hides and makes any tubing completely inaccessible and has the added benefit of stabilizing him a little so that the backpack load isn't quite as back-heavy. It works great. By the way, we've never actually found an issue with kids pulling on his tubes even when they are exposed but this gives a method for peace of mind.
**Tape: We use a couple kinds of tape. We use cloth tape and satin tape (both medical tapes). The cloth tape we use to create a little tag about midway down his extension tubing. We then use the tag to diaper-pin the extension tubing to his clothes. This makes it so that if the tubing gets pulled, it will pull on his clothes and not on his actual g-tube, reducing the risk of the g-tube getting pulled out accidentally and discomfort to him. We use the satin tape to affix gauze over the stoma. We don't tape directly to the skin, we just use a little to secure the open ends of the gauze together. I don't like the irritation that taping to the skin causes.
**Nighttime feeds: Many tube families will find themselves having to do overnight feeds at one time or another. When we first got our tube, we were never given an IV pole, so we didn't even know that was an option for hanging the bag at night. However, our son doesn't frequently stay the entire night in his bed anyway (sigh) and so we found that just extending the tubing and putting the backpack in a corner of his crib worked just fine and was way more portable than the IV pole.

Hope someone comes across this and finds it helpful! These are little things that have made our days run much smoother.

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Practicing Forgiveness

Charlie recently graduated from the infant room to the toddler room at his school. He has adapted wonderfully--I think he was more than ready for the challenge. He most enjoys gardening. The toddlers (18 mos-2.5 years) maintain a garden, growing sweet peas, cucumbers and carrots among other treats. Evidently, Charlie is quite the avid gardener, evidenced by the wonderful cucumber he brought home from school last week. I'm just sad he can't taste the fruits of his work.

Today, the school's director told me a story that positively warmed my heart and says everything about my sweet little boy. Another friend from school tried to bite Charlie today. After counseling and a discussion of the merits of not biting your friends, the offending little boy was put in a quiet time to reflect on his behavior. Charlie stood and watched his friend in trouble and then suddenly said to Melissa (the director), "No Lissa, hug!" and went to his friend, pulled him by the hands to standing and embraced him. Then, Charlie removed his pacifier and gave him a kiss.

I love seeing my little boy learning to extend forgiveness so effortlessly. I hope he holds onto this virtue.

As I write this, I just scolded Jack for screeching and asked him to sit quietly next to me for a few moments. Charlie immediately came over to sit next to his brother. :-)

Thursday, August 18, 2011

Back to Blogging

I took a couple week break from my blog challenge while traveling for work for two consecutive weeks. I haven't given up and plan to try to resume on Monday but for now we are preparing for a return to the hospital...Charlie is having surgery on Monday. Despite having done this many times before, I confess I am grappling with a lot of anxiety about this particular surgery. I'm praying for an easy recovery, no complications and not too much of a setback as far as his growth is concerned. Since we got his g-j tube about two months ago, he has been gaining weight really well, better than he ever has. He has been happier, he is sleeping through the night (!) and his personality (complete with a little almost-two-year-old sass) is shining through. We've really been enjoying the little boy we've been seeing. I'm just hoping this doesn't set us back too much.

On the Jack front, we have spent most of this week trying to readjust to being back home after a prolonged stay. Charlie and I were in Southern California for the past two weeks while Jared and Jack stayed here. Jack always has a bit of an adjustment period when we come back--clingy, emotional and in need of reassurance.

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Blog Challenge Day 9: Future

So, I am impressing myself with my commitment to keeping up this blog challenge.

Anyway, I think this is a little redundant to the "Where I'd Like to be in Ten Years" topic but since I can't come up with something more creative, I'll just go with this one but focus on the longer, longer term.

One of my favorite songs is Alan Jackson's "Remember When." Actually I'm pretty sure it is my favorite. I always think of this song when I think of how I'd like my future to look. Starting in the far future and moving backwards, I hope and pray that Jared and I get to see each other turn gray, retire, and enjoy a whole new season of life that is hopefully full of grandchildren and adventures. I'm hoping I can shed my practical, homebody mantle and enjoy some traveling with my husband. I hope we have made wise choices that afford us the opportunity to enjoy our older years without too many financial worries.

I often pray for my children's future spouses. I like to imagine what they are doing and how they are being shaped and molded to become what I hope is the perfect complement to my kids. To that end, I hope my children find someone to love and share life with. Marriage, for me, has been one of the hardest but most rewarding experiences. I simply can't imagine doing this alone. I know this may sound far-reaching and silly at this point in Charlie's life but every time we've been told of this health challenge or that and more recently, that Charlie's feeding tube is probably a permanent fixture in his life, I worry that it will be stumbling block in his dating life. I know...he's not even two and I have more complicated and pressing matters to worry about but...I'm being honest when I say this has crossed my mind more than once.

I have a wonderful relationship with my parents and my siblings (and in-laws as well!). I hope I can cultivate the same love for family in my children and teach them to rely on each other. I hope I have a deep and meaningful friendship with my kids as they become adults.

I secretly hope I have a "second career"--maybe as a nurse? I love what I do but I also can see myself being fulfilled in a different line of work.

I hope we have a house that people love to come to...that are lives are rich with family and friends and an open door. I really love Portland, more than I expected to, and so I do see us here for the long term but I hope we find that perfect neighborhood. I grew up in a little town that was completely walkable...it was safe, I walked to school, everyone knew each other (that's a little bit of an exaggeration but not much) and it had such personality and charm (and apparently, the second best beach in the country). I really hope we can find a town with a similar feel. Oh--and I would LOVE to have a vacation home, ideally on a lake or at the coast.

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Blog Challenge Day 8: Satisified

So, today's topic is a time when you were most satisfied with your life. This is difficult and has required a lot of thought. It's not that I live being dissatisfied exactly but I do struggle with contentment. I am frequently worrying about or anxious about something or I am thinking about what's next to come. I am especially guilty of this when it comes to my children. I have this very acute awareness that my fertile years are fleeting and I just don't feel done. I don't even particularly want another baby right now but I also can't let go of the idea that I am not ready to be done having them either. But, I digress. Satisfaction is the word of the day.

I think the time I felt the most satisfied overall in life was shortly after we brought Jack home from the hospital. I felt so complete and not just in motherhood but in my marriage. I loved having this person between me and Jared who we created, who we were wholly responsible for. My best memories are of the nights when he was an infant. I did not breastfeed but I did pump. I, as a meticulous, perfectionist, worrying Virgo (ha ha), did not want to leave my milk supply to chance so I woke up every three hours and pumped while Jared bottle fed Jack. We got into the habit of DVR'ing mindless sitcoms and Food Network shows such as Unwrapped. We also ate copious amounts of Uncrustables during this time, which may have contributed to my inability to lose the baby weight (ahem). Anyway, those 30 minute interludes are some of my sweetest memories...we were fumbling new parents, in awe over our little baby and, while fraught with all the worries and anxieties that come with new parenthood, in those midnight moments it was just me, Jared and Jack.

Monday, July 25, 2011

Blog Challenge Day 7: Astrological Sign



Disclaimer: I think astrological signs are fun but pretty much nonsense.

My birthday is September 1 and I am Virgo. Based on the following description, I think it describes me pretty well, actually.

Traditional Virgo Traits:

--Modest and shy (I am modest, I am not shy)
--Meticulous and reliable (I think this is accurate)
--Intelligent and analytical (yes, at least to the analytical part!)
--Fussy and a worrier (YES)
--Overcritical and harsh (hate to admit it but yes)
--Perfectionist and conservative (yes and yes)